许立志的诗
《我弥留之际》“On My Deathbed”
我想再看一眼大海,目睹我半生的泪水有多汪洋I want to take another look at the ocean, behold the vastness of tears from half a lifetime
我想再爬一爬高高的山头,试着把丢失的灵魂喊回来I want to climb another mountain, try to call back the soul that I’ve lost
我还想摸一摸天空,碰一碰那抹轻轻的蓝I want to touch the sky, feel that blueness so light
可是这些我都办不到了,我就要离开这个世界了But I can’t do any of this, so I’m leaving this world
所有听说过我的人们啊Everyone who’s heard of me
不必为我的离开感到惊讶Shouldn’t be surprised at my leaving
更不必叹息,或者悲伤Even less should you sigh or grieve
我来时很好,去时,也很好I was fine when I came, and fine when I left.
-- Xu Lizhi, 30 September 2014
《冲突》'Conflict'
他们都说They all say
我是个话很少的孩子I'm a child of few words
对此我并不否认This I don't deny
实际上But actually
我说与不说Whether I speak or not
都会跟这个社会With this society I'll still
发生冲突Conflict
-- 7 June 2013
《我就那样站着入睡》'I Fall Asleep, Just Standing Like That'
眼前的纸张微微发黄The paper before my eyes fades yellow
我用钢笔在上面凿下深浅不一的黑With a steel pen I chisel on it uneven black
里面盛满打工的词汇Full of working words
车间,流水线,机台,上岗证,加班,薪水……Workshop, assembly line, machine, work card, overtime, wages...
我被它们治得服服贴贴They've trained me to become docile
我不会呐喊,不会反抗Don't know how to shout or rebel
不会控诉,不会埋怨How to complain or denounce
只默默地承受着疲惫Only how to silently suffer exhaustion
驻足时光之初When I first set foot in this place
我只盼望每月十号那张灰色的薪资单I hoped only for that grey pay slip on the tenth of each month
赐我以迟到的安慰To grant me some belated solace
为此我必须磨去棱角,磨去语言For this I had to grind away my corners, grind away my words
拒绝旷工,拒绝病假,拒绝事假Refuse to skip work, refuse sick leave, refuse leave for private reasons
拒绝迟到,拒绝早退Refuse to be late, refuse to leave early
流水线旁我站立如铁,双手如飞By the assembly line I stood straight like iron, hands like flight,
多少白天,多少黑夜How many days, how many nights
我就那样,站着入睡Did I - just like that - standing fall asleep?
-- 20 August 2011
《一颗螺丝掉在地上》'A Screw Fell to the Ground'
一颗螺丝掉在地上A screw fell to the ground
在这个加班的夜晚In this dark night of overtime
垂直降落,轻轻一响Plunging vertically, lightly clinking
不会引起任何人的注意It won’t attract anyone’s attention
就像在此之前Just like last time
某个相同的夜晚On a night like this
有个人掉在地上When someone plunged to the ground
-- 9 January 2014
《谶言一种》'A Kind of Prophecy'
村里的老人都说Village elders say
我跟我爷爷年轻时很像I resemble my grandfather in his youth
刚开始我不以为然I didn’t recognize it
后来经他们一再提起But listening to them time and again
我就深信不疑了Won me over
我跟我爷爷My grandfather and I share
不仅外貌越看越像Facial expressions
就连脾性和爱好Temperaments, hobbies
也像同一个娘胎里出来的Almost as if we came from the same womb
比如我爷爷外号竹竿They nicknamed him “bamboo pole”
我外号衣架And me, “clothes hanger”
我爷爷经常忍气吞声He often swallowed his feelings
我经常唯唯诺诺I'm often obsequious
我爷爷喜欢猜谜He liked guessing riddles
我喜欢预言I like premonitions
1943年秋,鬼子进In the autumn of 1943, the Japanese devils invaded
我爷爷被活活烧死and burned my grandfather alive
享年23岁at the age of 23.
我今年23岁This year i turn 23.
-- 18 June 2013
《最后的墓地》'The Last Graveyard'
机台的鸣叫也打着瞌睡Even the machine is nodding off
密封的车间贮藏疾病的铁Sealed workshops store diseased iron
薪资隐藏在窗帘后面Wages concealed behind curtains
仿似年轻打工者深埋于心底的爱情Like the love that young workers bury at the bottom of their hearts
没有时间开口,情感徒留灰尘With no time for expression, emotion crumbles into dust
他们有着铁打的胃They have stomachs forged of iron
盛满浓稠的硫酸,硝酸Full of thick acid, sulfuric and nitric
工业向他们收缴来不及流出的泪Industry captures their tears before they have the chance to fall
时辰走过,他们清醒全无Time flows by, their heads lost in fog
产量压低了年龄,疼痛在日夜加班Output weighs down their age, pain works overtime day and night
还未老去的头晕潜伏生命In their lives, dizziness before their time is latent
皮肤被治具强迫褪去The jig forces the skin to peel
顺手镀上一层铝合金And while it's at it, plates on a layer of aluminum alloy
有人还在坚持着,有人含病离去Some still endure, while others are taken by illness
我在他们中间打盹,留守青春的I am dozing between them, guarding
最后一块墓地The last graveyard of our youth.
-- 21 December 2011
《我一生中的路还远远没有走完》'My Life’s Journey is Still Far from Complete'
这是谁都没有料到的This is something no one expected
我一生中的路My life’s journey
还远远没有走完Is far from over
就要倒在半路上了But now it's stalled at the halfway mark
类似的困境It’s not as if similar difficulties
以前也不是没有Didn’t exist before
只是都不像这次But they didn’t come
来得这么突然As suddenly
这么凶猛As ferociously
一再地挣扎Repeatedly struggle
竟全是徒劳But all is futile
我比谁都渴望站起来I want to stand up more than anyone else
可是我的腿不答应But my legs won’t cooperate
我的胃不答应My stomach won’t cooperate
我全身的骨头都不答应All the bones of my body won’t cooperate
我只能这样平躺着I can only lie flat
在黑暗里一次次地发出In this darkness, sending out
无声的求救信号A silent distress signal, again and again
再一次次地听到Only to hear, again and again
绝望的回响The echo of desperation.
-- 13 July 2014
《我咽下一枚铁做的月亮》'I Swallowed a Moon Made of Iron'
我咽下一枚铁做的月亮I swallowed a moon made of iron
他们把它叫做螺丝They refer to it as a nail
我咽下这工业的废水,失业的订单I swallowed this industrial sewage, these unemployment documents
那些低于机台的青春早早夭亡Youth stooped at machines die before their time
我咽下奔波,咽下流离失所I swallowed the hustle and the destitution
咽下人行天桥,咽下长满水锈的生活Swallowed pedestrian bridges, life covered in rust
我再咽不下了I can't swallow any more
所有我曾经咽下的现在都从喉咙汹涌而出All that I've swallowed is now gushing out of my throat
在祖国的领土上铺成一首Unfurling on the land of my ancestors
耻辱的诗Into a disgraceful poem.
-- 19 December 2013
《出租屋》'Rented Room'
十平米左右的空间A space of ten square meters
局促,潮湿,终年不见天日Cramped and damp, no sunlight all year
我在这里吃饭,睡觉,拉屎,思考Here I eat, sleep, shit, and think
咳嗽,偏头痛,生老,病不死Cough, get headaches, grow old, get sick but still fail to die
昏黄的灯光下我一再发呆,傻笑Under the dull yellow light again I stare blankly, chuckling like an idiot
来回踱步,低声唱歌,阅读,写诗I pace back and forth, singing softly, reading, writing poems
每当我打开窗户或者柴门Every time I open the window or the wicker gate
我都像一位死者I seem like a dead man
把棺材盖,缓缓推开Slowly pushing open the lid of a coffin.
-- 2 December 2013
《惊闻90后青工诗人许立志坠楼有感》'Upon Hearing the News of Xu Lizhi's Suicide'by Zhou Qizao (周启早), a fellow worker at Foxconn
每一个生命的消失The loss of every life
都是另一个我的离去Is the passing of another me
又一枚螺丝松动Another screw comes loose
又一位打工兄弟坠楼Another migrant worker brother jumps
你替我死去You die in place of me
我替你继续写诗And I keep writing in place of you
顺便拧紧螺丝While I do so, screwing the screws tighter
今天是祖国六十五岁的生日Today is our nation's sixty-fifth birthday
举国欢庆We wish the country joyous celebrations
二十四岁的你立在灰色的镜框里微微含笑A twenty-four-year-old you stands in the grey picture frame, smiling ever so slightly
秋风秋雨Autumn winds and autumn rain
白发苍苍的父亲捧着你黑色的骨灰盒趔趄还乡A white-haired father, holding the black urn with your ashes, stumbles home.
-- 1 October 2014