30岁之前,请读一读《相约星期二》

Morrie Schwartz是美国布兰戴斯大学(Brandeis University)的社会学教授,幽默风趣爱跳舞,家庭幸福事业美满,人生赢家不过如此。

不幸的是,1994年,77岁的Morrie患上了和霍金一样的病,ASL,Lou Gehrig's disease,俗成“渐冻人症”。

这个不治之症并没有击垮他,他坚持上完这个学期的课,他开始研究死亡是怎么一回事,并且把自己的想法写下来分享给朋友们。如果Morrie也用微信的话,我想他会时不时发“珍惜现在” “向死而生”这样的金ji句tang(书中称为"aphorism")。有位同事把这些想法发给了一位记者,记者写了篇长文报道了Morrie的故事。

这篇文章在当时应该也是篇10w+,引起了美国广播公司Nightline节目的注意。于是Morrie上了电视,和约900万观众分享了他的故事和人生哲学。

这个节目被Morrie曾经的一位学生看到,他开始每星期二飞越700英里到老人家里陪着他,跟他“上课”:The class met on Tuesdays. It began after breakfast. The subject was The Meaning of Life. It was taught from experience.

这堂课持续了15周,直到1995年11月Morrie去世。这位学生把15周的谈话写成了一本书: Tuesdays with Morries,希望把老人的思考分享给更多的人。

Tuesdays with Morries共192页,语言简单直白,常用短句和重复,多以对话的方式记录恩师的教诲。这15周聊了许多话题,我稍作以下整理,建议边看边出声读一读:

World: The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. Love is the only rational act.

Feeling Sorry for Yourself: I give myself a good cry if I need it. But then I concentrate on all the good things still in my life.

Regrets: What if today were my last day on earth?

Death: Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.

Everyone knows they're going to die, but nobody believes it. If we did, we would do things differently. Most of us all walk around as if we're sleepwalking. We really don't experience the world fully, because we're half-sleep, doing things we automatically think we have to do.

Family: There is no experience like having children.

Emotions: Learn to detach. Don't cling to things, because everything is impermanent.

Fear of AgingIt is impossible for the old not to envy the young. But the issue is to accept who you are and revel in that.

Foget what the culture says. Morrie并没有因为自己生活无法自理,连屁股都得别人替他擦而觉得丢人,他觉得自己像是又成了婴儿,享受这份呵护。

Morrie也不觉得年轻就一定好,因为每个年纪都有不同的美,变老不只是身体衰老,它还意味着成长,我们的生活变得更有质量,思想更成熟,精神世界更加丰腴。他认为那些说希望自己重返青春的人多是因为还没有找到人生的意义:

If you've found meaning in your life, you don't want to go back. You want to go forward. You want to see more, do more. You can't wait until sixty-five.

Money: You know what really gives you satisfaction? Offering others what you have to give.

How Love Goes On: Invest in people.

Marriage: You get tested. You find out who you are, who the other person is, and how you accommodate or don't.

Morrie说现在许多人的问题是不懂得如何经营婚姻,爱的快散的也快。他认为这是因为:They don't know what they want in a partner. They don't know who they are themselves--so how can they know who they're marrying?

 Culture: Build your own little subculture.

I don't mean you disregard every rule of your community. I don't go around naked, for example. I don't run through red lights. The little things, I can obey. But the big things--how we think what we value--those you must choose yourself. You can't let anyone--or any society--determine those for you.

Forgiveness: Forgive yourself before you die. Then forgive others.

如果你对以上内容感兴趣的话,我建议你花上一下午的时间读一读。另外可以看看当年Nightline采访Morrie的视频:

读书,顺便学点儿英文。最后和你分享书中用到的10个实用表达,能把这10个彻底掌握学以致用就可以了。如果你也读这本书的话,我建议你也整理一份自己的学习笔记,最后精选10个你特别想记住、特别想分享给他人的表达。

1. He developed asthma in his sixties. (“得病”的动词可以用develop,类似的表达还有come down with)

2. His voice was strong and inviting, and his mind was vibrating with a million thoughts.

invite是“邀请”,不过inviting却表示“吸引人的”。因此“迷人的微笑”可以说an inviting smile,“空气怡人”可以说The air is inviting。

3. He refused to be depressed. Instead, Morrie had become a lightning rod of ideas.

lightning rod本意是“避雷针”,我们可以用someone is a lightning rod of something表示“招引...的人”,例如“他是个争议性人物”就可以说He is a lightning rod for controversy.

4. The dream soured.

sour本意是“酸”,动词表示“变馊”,除了形容食物外也常用来形容状况、关系变得糟糕,和中文的“变味了”差不多。

这里的“the dream soured"可以理解为“梦想破灭了”,咱们还可以说Everything turns sour.表示“一切都变得很不顺利",Our relationship goes sour. 表示“我们的关系变得大不如从前”(可能是友谊的小船翻了,要分手了之类)。

5. It cracks me up. (使...大笑)

6. This is smokescreen. (幌子,障眼法)

7. Eva would accept nothing less  than excellence in school, because she saw education as the only antidote to their poverty.

antidote是“解药”的意思,常用来表示“妙方”,后面介词用to。文中说education是poverty的antidote值得背下来。

8. A colleague read a note from a woman name Nancy, who had lost her mother to ALS. (学会lose someone to +疾病这个表达)

9. One friend was so taken with the words that he sent them to a Boston Globe reporter.

文中还出现了:

Koppel seemed extremely taken with Morrie.

一想到“有兴趣”我们可能会说be interested in, be attracted to,be into,还可以怎么说呢?下一次试试这个be taken with吧。

10. I hope Ted goes easy on Morrie.

go easy on someone可以表示“对某人手下留情”,这个表达很实用。例如点咖啡的时候想说“少加点冰”,去饭店吃饭想说“少放点盐”,我们就可以说"please go easy on the ice/salt".


30岁之前,要听听Morrie的话。

30岁之后,争取听得懂,做得到。

Live, with dignity, with courage, with humor, with composure.

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