你有没有想过为什么有一些人看起来比其他人更快乐？而为什么你总是很难感受到快乐？也许你会安慰自己说：等我事业有成了，我就会快乐；等我成为富豪了，我就会快乐；等我再瘦一些，我就会快乐……但事实上，“当我拥有了xx时，我就会快乐”这一公式是行不通的。正如小贝在之前的推文里写过，幸福并不取决于事物，而在于你的内心世界和你专注于事物的能力。Happiness fuels success, not the other way around. 快乐推动成功，而不是反过来。哈佛大学推荐过20个会让人变得快乐的习惯。附双语版本，很适合做晨读内容，建议每日一遍，身心愉悦。
1. Be grateful.学会感恩。Slow down, look around you, and pay attention to the little details in your life – the delicate purple flower on the sidewalk, the beautiful sunset, the hot shower that washes away your long day, and the smile in your partner’s eyes…放慢自己的脚步，看看你的周围，关注生活中的细微之处：人行道上淡紫色的花，美丽的日落，洗去你一天疲惫的淋浴，伴侣眼中的笑容。When you have a grateful heart that is appreciative of life’s beauty, wonder and blessings, you’re automatically filled with happiness.当你拥有一颗感恩的心，能欣赏生活的美，思考和祝福，你自然就充满了幸福。2. Choose your friends wisely.明智地选择自己的朋友。According to Harvard, the most important external factors affecting individual happiness are human relationships.根据哈佛大学的研究，影响个人幸福最重要的外部因素是人际关系。So if you want to be happy, choose to be around people who are optimistic, who appreciate you as you are, and who can make your life richer, bigger, more fun, and more meaningful.所以如果你想变得快乐，要选择和乐观的朋友在一起，他们能欣赏真实的你，让你的生活变得更丰富、快乐、有意义。
△ 图片来源：电影《房间》3. Cultivate compassion.培养同情心。When we try to step into other people’s shoes and understand a situation from another’s perspective, we’re more likely to handle the situation with compassion, objectivity and effectiveness. There will be less conflicts and more happiness.当我们换位思考，站在另一个角度看问题，我们更能用同情心，客观和有效的处理问题。生活中就会少一些冲突，多一点快乐。4. Become a problem solver.学会解决问题。Happy people are problem solvers. When they encounter a challenge in life, they don’t beat themselves up and fall into a depressive state.快乐的人是解决问题的人。当他们在生活中遇到挑战时，他们不会自虐，然后陷入消沉。Instead, they face up to the challenge and channel their energies toward finding creative a solution.相反，他们会直面挑战，调动全身力量寻找解决办法。By becoming a problem solver, you’ll build up your self-confidence and your ability to accomplish whatever it is you set your mind to – and whatever challenges life throws your way.通过变成一个解决问题的人，你会建立自己的自信心和下决心要的事情和直面挑战的能力。5. Keep learning.不断学习。Learning keeps us young and dreams keep us alive.学习让我们保持年轻，梦想让我们充满活力。When we engage our brains and put them toward productive uses, we’re less likely to dwell on unhappy thoughts and much more likely to feel happy and fulfilled.当我们使用我们的大脑，并将其用于富有成效的用途时，我们就不太会停留在不快乐的想法上，而是更容易感到快乐和满足。
△ 图片来源：电影《死亡诗社》6. Do what you love.做你想做的事情。Since we spend over one-third of our adult life working, loving what we do has a huge impact on our overall happiness.既然我们成年生活的三分之一时间都在工作，那么做我们想做的事对我们的整体辛福感就有很大的影响。It’s one of life’s greatest blessings to find a line of work that we’re deeply passionate about and that utilizes our greatest gifts.能找到自己热爱的工作，并能利用自己的天赋，这是人生最大的幸福之一。If this is not possible at the moment, then try to find enjoyment and meaning in your current work, or cultivate a hobby that involves doing something you love.如果现在还不能做你想做的事情，那就试着在你现在的工作中寻找乐趣和意义，或者培养一个你喜爱的兴趣。7. Live in the present.活在当下。When you feel depressed, you’re living in the past. When you feel worried or anxious, you’re living in the future. But when you feel content, happy and peaceful, you’re living in the present.当你感到沮丧时，你是活在过去。当你感到担忧或焦虑时，你是生活在未来。但当你感到满足、快乐和平和时，你就活在当下。8. Laugh often.要经常笑。Laughter is the most powerful anecdote to anger or depression.笑是对抗生气或沮丧最有力的东西。Research has shown that the simple act of curving the corners of your mouth can increase your feeling of happiness.研究表明，简单的嘴角弯曲这个动作就可以增加你的幸福感。So don’t take life too seriously. Try to find humor and laughter in life’s everyday struggles.不要把生活看的太严肃。要学会在每日的奋斗中寻找幽默感和笑声。
△ 图片来源：电影《海蒂和爷爷》9. Create deeper connections.学会深交。Our happiness multiplies when we connect and bond with another human being on a deeper level.当我们和另一个人深交时，我们的幸福感会成倍增加。And being fully present and listening are two of the most important skills to strengthening that bond and bringing happiness to ourselves, and to others.全身心投入和倾听是加强这种关系纽带、将快乐带给自己和他人的两个最重要的技能。10. Say thanks often.要经常说谢谢。Always be appreciative of the blessings in your life.时常对来自生活中的善意报以感激。And it’s equally important to express your appreciation to those who’ve made your life better in some way, big or small.同时，向那些让你的生活变好的人，无论大小，表达你的感谢也很重要。11. Practice forgiveness.学会原谅。Resentment and anger are forms of self-punishment. When you forgive, you’re actually practicing kindness to yourself.憎恨和生气是对自我的惩罚。当你释怀的时候，事实上你是在对自己施以善意。So learn to forgive those who have hurt you in the past. And most importantly, learn to forgive yourself.所以要学会原谅过去伤害过你的人。最重要的是，学会原谅自己。Everyone makes mistakes. It’s through our mistakes that we learn and grow to become a bigger and better person.每个人都犯错。只有通过我们的错误，我们才慢慢学会如何成为一个更强大，更好的人。
△ 图片来源：英剧《伦敦生活》第一季12. Keep your agreement.守承诺。Our self-esteem is built on the agreements we’ve made with ourselves. And high self-esteem has a direct correlation to happiness.我们的自尊建立在我们对自己信守承诺的基础之上。而高度的自尊和幸福感又有直接的关联。So keep your agreements with others and with yourself. Do what you say you’re going to do.所以要对自己和别人遵守承诺，做你说过要做的事。13. Meditate.冥想。According to Harvard, people who take 8 sessions of mindfulness meditation training are, on average, 20% happier than a control group.根据哈佛大学的研究，就平均而言，上过8次正念冥想训练的人要比控制狂多快乐20%。Such training can lead to structural brain changes including increased grey-matter density in the hippocampus, known to be important for learning and memory, and in structures associated with self-awareness, compassion and introspection.这样的训练可以导致大脑结构的变化，包括海马体的灰质密度的增加，这对学习和记忆很重要，在结构上与自我意识，同情心和内省。14. Love unconditionally.无条件的爱。No one is perfect. Accept yourself for all of your imperfections. And do so for others.人无完人。接受自己的不完美，同时也要这样对待他人。Loving someone unconditionally does not mean that you need to spend all your time with them or help them figure out their problems.无条件地爱一个人并不意味着你要花所有的时间和他们在一起，或者帮助他们解决问题。Unconditional love means accepting people as they are, and allowing them to find their own ways, at their own pace.无条件的爱意味着接受人们原本的样子，允许他们按照自己的节奏找到自己的方式。
△ 图片来源：电影《玛丽和马克思》15. Be optimistic.要乐观。For happy people, the glass is always half-full. If your tendency is to imagine the very worst-case scenario every time you face a challenge, then train yourself to reverse that tendency.对快乐的人来说，玻璃杯里总是半满的。如果你每次面对挑战时都倾向于想象最坏的情况，那么训练自己扭转这种倾向。Ask yourself what good can come out of the situation or what you can learn from it. Optimism surely fuels success and happiness.问问自己在这种情况下能得到什么好处，或者你能从中学到什么。乐观肯定会带来成功和幸福。16. Focus on what you’re doing.关注你在做的事情。When you put your mind, heart and soul into what you’re doing, you’re creating a happiness state – called the “flow.”当你全身心投入一件事的时候，你就会处于一个快乐的状态。When you’re living in the flow, you’re less likely to care about what others may think of you, and less bothered by things that are not that important.当我们处于这种状态，你就不大会关心别人对你怎么看，不大会被不大重要的事情干扰。The result? More happiness, of course!结果呢？当然是更幸福啦！17. Don’t give up.不要放弃。Unfinished projects and repeated defeats inevitably dampen one’s self-esteem.未完成的计划和不断的失败会打击一个人的自尊，这不可避免。If you’ve made up your mind to do something, see it through. Don’t give up until you succeed.如果你下定决心做某事，就坚持到底。在成功之前不要放弃。Remember, failure is temporary but defeat is permanent. And defeat only occurs when you give up.记住，失败是暂时的，而挫败是永久的。只有你放弃了，才会被打败。
△ 图片来源：电影《死亡诗社》18. Do your best and then let go.尽你所能，然后放手。Everyone has limitations, and things don’t always turn out to be what we’d like them to be – despite our efforts.每个人都有局限性，而且有时候即便我们很努力了，事情的结局也未必会尽如人意。So always give your best, and then let go. Let events run their course. When you’ve done your best, you’ll have no regrets.所以尽最大的努力，然后放手。让事情顺其自然。当你尽了全力，就不会后悔了。19. Take care of yourself.好好照顾自己。A healthy body is the key to happiness. If you have poor health, it’s very difficult to be happy no matter how hard you try.健康的身体是幸福的关键。如果你身体不好，无论你如何努力，都很难快乐。So make sure you eat well, exercise and find time to rest. Take good care of your body, your mind and your spirit.所以确保你吃得好、保持锻炼、找时间休息。好好照顾你的身体、思想和精神。20. Give back.学会给予。Doing good is one of the surest ways to feel good.做好事是最能让你心情愉悦的方法之一。According to Harvard, when people do good, their brains becomes active in the very same reward center that is stimulated when they experience other rewards.根据哈佛大学的研究，当人们做好事时，他们的大脑变得活跃，就像他们在经历其他奖励时受到刺激一样。So it’s not a surprise that people who care more about others are happier than those who care less about others.所以，关心别人的人比不关心别人的人更快乐，这点并不奇怪。
