【翻译专栏】战争是怎么爆发的 / 译：李峰
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斯蒂文森一家正在吃晚饭。吃了一阵儿之后，他们的儿子汤姆说话了：“爸，你知道战争是怎么爆发的吗”？
斯蒂文森想了一会儿，然后说：“呃，我想是这样的，我来给你举个例子吧。我们就拿英国和美国来说，如果是它们要打起来……”
这时，斯蒂文森太太笑了，对她丈夫说：“那不可能，英国和美国作为同盟已经有两百多年了，它们怎么会打起来”。
“是的，这我知道”，斯蒂文森应道：“我只是拿它们举个例子” 。
“但这不是个好例子”，斯蒂文森太太说道：“拿法国和德国举例才好”。
“拿英国和美国举例最好”，斯蒂文森答道，“现在它们关系是不错，但在过去它们敌对过，它们开过打”。
“那是老早以前的事情了”，斯蒂文森太太回道：“你应该举现代的例子”。
“但你总得让我回答儿子的问题吧”！斯蒂文森生气地说道。
“但如果你讲的不对的话，那就不要讲”。斯蒂文森太太并不退让。
“我并没有讲错啊！”斯蒂文森吼道：“我给他的是完美的答案”。
“别冲我吼”!斯蒂文森太太叫道：“我才不是你那些愚蠢的朋友中的一个”!
“我的朋友哪里蠢了！”斯蒂文森腾地站起来，生气地走出了屋子。
“现在我来回答你的问题”。斯蒂文森太太对儿子说。
“不用了，妈”，汤姆说，“你和爸已经回答我了”。
原文How Wars Begin
The Stevenson family was having dinner. The family ate without talking for several minutes， then Tom said， “Daddy， do you know how wars begin？”
Mr. Stevenson thought for a moment， then he said， “Yes， I think so. I’ll give you an example. We’ll take two countries， Britain and America. If Britain fought with America...”
Mrs. Stevenson laughed. “That’s crazy，” she said to her husband. “Britain and America have been friends for over two hundred years. They’ll never fight.”
“Yes， I know that，” Mr. Stevenson said. “I was only using them as an example.”
“But they’re not a good example，” Mrs. Stevenson said. “France and Germany are a better example.”
“Britain and America are the best example，” Mr. Stevenson replied. “They are friends now but they were enemies in the past. They fought a war！”
“But that was a long time ago，” Mrs. Stevenson said. “You should use more modern examples.”
“And you should let me answer my son’s question，” Mr. Stevenson said angrily.
“Not when you give him wrong answers，” Mrs. Stevenson said.
“I am not giving him wrong answers！” Mr. Stevenson shouted. “I am giving him perfectly good answers.”
“Don’t shout at me！” Mrs. Stevenson cried. “I’m not one of your stupid friends.”
“My friends aren’t stupid！” Mr. Stevenson stood up and walked angrily out of the room.
“Now I’ll answer your question，” Mrs. Stevenson said to her son.
“It’s all right， Mom，” he said. “You and Dad already have.”
作者简介
译者简介:
李峰，银行职员，闲暇写点文字，偶而见刊发表，既抒发胸臆，亦结缘向学。万象出新胜小说，鼓角灯前喜泪多。伴得我儿同成长，此生放纵不蹉跎。
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