学习笔记006—读Little Women，学做好女人

学习笔记006—读Little Women，学做好女人

第一次听说这本书还是在看老友记时，有一集中Rachel读的一本书就是Little Women，然后Joey借去读，读到Beth病重部分，Joey很伤心，把书丢进了冰箱里......

非常喜欢这本书，读完以后还有想读第二遍的冲动。这本书让我知道母亲在一个家庭所扮演角色的重要性，小说中的母亲角色（Mrs March）具有正确的人生观、价值观，爱情观，乐于帮助他人，以身作则言传身教，为自己的子女树立了很好的榜样，洞察一切却不说破，等着女儿自愿向自己倾诉所遇到的烦心事，从来没有把自己的思想强加给自己的女儿，而是慢慢引导让女儿自己真正觉悟。小说中的母亲说过很多经典的话，摘录自己最喜欢的几点如下：

1.关于金钱、爱情：

"I want my daughters to be beautiful, accomplished, and good; to be admired, loved, and respected; to have a happy youth, to be well and wisely married, and to lead useful, pleasant lives, with as little care and sorrow to try them as God sees fit to send. To be loved and chosen by a good man is the best and sweetest thing which can happen to a woman; and I sincerely hope my girls may know this beautiful experience."

"right to hope and wait for it, and wise to prepare for it; so that, when the happy time comes, you may feel ready for the duties, and worthy of the joy.My dear girls, I am ambitious for you, but not to have you make a dash in the world-marry rich men merely because they are rich, or have splendid houses, which are not homes because love is wanting. "

"Money is a needful and precious thing-and, when well used, a noble thing-but I never want you to think of it as the first or only prize to strive for.I'd rather see you poor men's wives, if you were happy, beloved, contented, than queens on thrones, without self-respect and peace."

"Money is a good and useful thing, and I hope my girls will never feel the need of it too bitterly, nor be tempted by too much. I should like to know that John(Meg's husband) was firmly established in some good business, which gave him an income large enough to keep free from debt and make Meg comfortable. I'm not ambitious for a splendid fortune, a fashionable position, or a great name for my girls. If rank and money come with love and virtue, also, I should accept them gratefully, and enjoy your good fortune, but I know, by experience, how much genuine happiness can be had in a plain little house, where the daily bread is earned, and some privations give sweetness to the few pleasures. I am content to see Meg begin humbly, for if I am not mistaken, she will be rich in the possession of a good man's heart, and that is better than a fortune."

2.关于工作：

"Work is wholesome, and there is plenty for everyone; it keeps us from ennui and mischief, is good for health and spirits, and gives us a sense of independence better than money or fashion."

"Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well. Then youth will be delightful, old age will bring few regrets, and life will become a beautiful success，in spite of poverty."

3.关于坏脾气：

"My dear, don't let the sun go down upon your anger. Forgive each other, help each other, and begin again tomorrow."

Don't cry so bitterly, but remember this day, and resolve with all your soul that you will never know another like it. dear, we all have our temptations, some far greater than yours, and it often takes us all our lives to conquer them. You think your temper is the worst in the world, but mine used to be just like it."

"I've been trying to cure it for forty years, and have only succeeded in controlling it. I am angry nearly every day of my life, Jo, but I have learned not to show it, and I still hope to learn not to feel it, though it may take me another forty years to do so."

"I've learned to check the hasty words that rise to my lips, and when I feel that they mean to break out against my will, I just go away for a minute, and give myself a little shake for being so weak and wicked,"

4.关于母亲的榜样作用：

"I must try to practice all the virtues I would have my little girls possess, for I was their example. It was easier to try for your sakes than for my own. A startled or surprised look from one of you when I spoke sharply rebuked me more than any words could have done, and the love, respect, and confidence of my children was the sweetest reward I could receive for my efforts to be the woman I would have them copy."

5.关于扮演母亲、妻子角色

"You have only made the mistake that most young wives make—forgotten your duty to your husband in your love for your children. A very natural and forgivable mistake, Meg, but one that had better be remedied before you take to different ways, for children should draw you nearer than ever, not separate you, as if they were all yours, and John had nothing to do but support them. I've seen it for some weeks, but have not spoken, feeling sure it would come right in time."

"Not all the time, too much confinement makes you nervous, and then you are unfitted for everything. Besides, you owe something to John as well as to the babies. Don't neglect husband for children, don't shut him out of the nursery, but teach him how to help in it. His place is there as well as yours, and the children need him. Let him feel that he has a part to do, and he will do it gladly and faithfully, and it will be better for you all."

"Go out more, keep cheerful as well as busy, for you are the sunshine-maker of the family, and if you get dismal there is no fair weather. Then I'd try to take an interest in whatever John likes—talk with him, let him read to you, exchange ideas, and help each other in that way. Don't shut yourself up in a bandbox because you are a woman, but understand what is going on, and educate yourself to take your part in the world's work, for it all affects you and yours."

介绍完这位完美的母亲，不得不了解下小说中的四个女主角，Meg， Jo，Beth 和Amy，四个人每个人的个性都非常鲜明。Meg贤妻良母，Jo独立自主，Beth善良单纯，Amy知性优雅。

Meg是姐妹四个最大的，她漂亮、温和，羡慕富人的生活，曾经有个梦想是想要一个房子，里面有各种奢华的食物、衣服、家具，以及很多的钱，很多的佣人，自己不需要工作。后来和并不富有却勤劳的John结婚，约定两人之间烦心事绝不打扰别人，时常羡慕朋友奢侈的生活，但是慢慢被John的爱所转变。有了自己的孩子后，独揽照顾子女的一切事项而忽视自己的丈夫，疲惫不堪的同时，和John感情不如以往，听取母亲的建议，让John承担照顾子女应承担的父亲责任，关注John所喜欢的事情，幸福的家庭重新恢复。最后得到了自己想得到的一切（I've got them all, thank God, and am the happiest woman in the world）。

Jo给人的感觉就像女汉子，特立独行、具有自己的思想，具有冒险精神，喜欢社会变革者，想要成为他们中一员，认为Amy属于守旧派，自己属于新世界。梦想房间有一堆书，使用很好的墨水台书写小说，要做了不起的事情，写书并变得富有，期待有一天能使所有人大吃一惊。她认为虽然财富是最想要的东西，但是贫穷也有它的好处，从窘境中能通过劳动获得真正的满足，从来不嫉妒富家小姐，自己能够提供给自己想要的是最大的满足。拒绝Laurie对其疯狂的爱，认为自己是风，缺乏柔性，两人在一起不会幸福，而Amy是太阳，能够更好的管理男人，比自己更适合Laurie。因Beth的去世一度消沉，生活变得暗淡无光，在母亲鼓励下重新拿起笔书写真实的故事，受到大家的欢迎。期盼着属于自己的爱情，最终选择与年长、并不富有的Bhaer教授在一起，并对其说，“我很高兴你不富有，自己不能忍受富有的丈夫，不担心贫穷，做自己喜欢的事情已经足够”，最终如其所愿，与Bhaer过着幸福喜欢的生活（There's no need for me to say it, for everyone can see that I'm far happier than I deserve）。

谈起Beth就非常让人心疼，她安静、胆小、害羞而具有音乐天赋，因为有一架小钢琴而心满意足，梦想就是和父亲母亲安全的待在家中，帮助照顾家人，希望全家人能够健康的在一起。与Jo关系最好，喜欢驯服的鸟儿peep(又名stint，滨鹬yu），因为这种鸟看起来很开心而善于倾诉，认为Jo是海鸥gull，坚强难以约束，喜欢狂风暴雨，远远飞向大海，而自得其乐，Meg是斑鸠turtledove，Amy是百灵鸟lark。为自己没有计划和理想而悲伤，19岁的年龄承受着身体状况糟糕带来的痛苦，感受到身体一天不如一天，并认为自己身体变坏就像潮汐，一旦开始，就不会停止，即使即将告别人世，也试图使留下来继续活下去的人更快乐一些。对于仅有短暂绽放的生命感悟是“我们离开人世时，爱是唯一能带走的东西，它使生命的结束变得轻松”（love is the only thing that we can carry with us when we go, and it makes the end so easy.）。

Amy，一开始最不喜欢的角色就是Amy，认为这个女人不仅任性而且圆滑势利，但是看着看着开始欣赏她对自己的理想锲而不舍的追求以及为之所付出的努力。她理智，能够很好的控制自己的情绪，知道如何更好的取悦他人，梦想是成为一个艺术家，去罗马画画，成为全世界最好的艺术家，任何什么困难都不能阻碍她对高雅艺术的追求。与此同时，她也学习享受其他的事情，认为即使不能成为伟大的艺术家，决定也要成为一个有魅力的、多才多艺的完美女人。她一直最看重的是金钱、地位、时尚和优雅的生活方式，喜欢和拥有这些的人打交道，想要成为lady，坚信自己生来就是gentlewoman，培养自己的贵族气息，时刻为远离贫穷而准备着。后来却拒绝了可以满足她所有择偶标准人的追求，这个人拥有她所看重的金钱和地位，因为她开始发现金钱和地位并不是最重要的，还有一些比他们更重要的事情，开始变得不那么热心社交，转而专心画画，最终和小说中的男一号Laurie幸福的走在一起（Thank God, I'm a happy woman）